need to finish chapter so I can make pie

In retrospect it was a mistake to find a title for this fic before the first chapter is ready.

I have such itchy posting fingers when a fic chapter is close to done, and normally the "oh shit but I still have to think of a title" helps hold me back... but I found my title last night and I still have half the chapter to edit before yeeting it off to betas and I haven't posted anything in so loooooong...